girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im calling her cock vulture from now on
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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