your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
