But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
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I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
He shit in the fireplace
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
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