just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Randomize
