What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize