how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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