My friends, they love my intelligence
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
