Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize