I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize