This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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