The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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