That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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