GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
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