Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
How's work?
Spinning.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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