with your own penis?
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
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And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
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He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
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