One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
