sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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