you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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