Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
