you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
