But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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