Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
