You don't have asthma, your pregnant
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize