Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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