My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
You work out of a Hotel?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
