Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
