i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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