did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Plan B is the new Plan A
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
You need Xanax blowdarts
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
i think my cat just said my name.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
