You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize