booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
