just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
