I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
We're like a lot better than the average bears
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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