ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
