Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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