I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
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