Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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