My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
