He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
it's like heaven, but drunker
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize