I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize