im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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