I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
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I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I supernannyed him into submission
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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