I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
