So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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