I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
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there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
God I need to hump something, right now.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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