AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
