so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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