I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize