grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Drunk is not a location!
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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