So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
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