After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
