Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
