The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
